Finally writing about it...

Expect the unexpected, I always tell my friends and family. I guess I have to practice what I am preaching now. I had overseen everything from the beginning and I think the kindness, eagerness and sincerity I had shown were all put to a different perspective. The story goes this way....

 I have met this person, I will name him Student I (introvert) last July 9,2012. The usual thing went on, I introduced myself, hoping that he would do the same thing even just a bit of it. Well, he told me his name, his age, ( which I don't often get from my students), his job, where he is now. One thing I won't forget from the first meeting was, "I don't have hobbies". It hit me like a cold ice, this guy's life is boring then, I thought. The next day, he is my student again. His interest with my lesson lasted for a year. So I have been talking to him from July 2012 to July 2013. Wow! I couldn't believe I had pushed my patience so hard to give a decent lesson to this guy. And his interest? MEDICINE! What the hell would I do to make my brain understand the ins and outs of this field?! I took the challenge positively, did my best to provide topics that are within his interest alone. With the length of time that we were talking to each other, I had discovered so many things about him.

Problem 1:
He couldn't figure out his opinion based on abstract knowledge. Everything for him should be scientific. Without proper explanation of mechanism of certain event, it doesn't exist for him. Talk about being NERD here! Or basically, he just refuse to let other people know his perception.

Solution:
I provided him topics that are proven facts. Theories is fine for him but it should be presented in a way that there is a possibility to prove him with substantial amount of data.

Problem 2:
He kept telling me he wanted to speak out more but he just doesn't have the courage to do so. Is he shy or introvert? I had concluded the latter before but now I have proven that he is not. He's totally SHY.

Solution:
I dug up the internet for different articles and advise even positive views of being shy or introvert. I used a lot of examples of people living their lives in solitude yet they made extraordinary things and made themselves known to others in a rewarding way. Eleanor Roosevelt and Gandhi would be the perfect examples which Susan Cain mentioned in her TedTalks: The power of introvert. I had given these examples and I had hoped it would encourage him to use his personality in a good way rather than make shyness eat him. But I guess I failed.

Problem 3:
I am fully aware that we have mood swings. Sometimes, we don't think of other people when we do so. Even so, I tried my very best not to show those mood swings that I sometimes have. But I guess he is not doing the same thing. He's sometimes in the influence of alcohol, if not, he's still drinking. Well, I didn't mind that. I just told him that it is better to talk to him if he is in his normal state of mind. Every time he's drunk in class, I feel scared and nervous and I can't concentrate with the lesson.

Solution:
IGNORE.

Recently, he did something I never expected. He contacted me using his private skype ID and he said he misses me and wants friendship, this was after awhile of not having a lesson. I was surprised because he is the least person I would expect to do so considering the above mentioned personality. And also the fact that after all the efforts I had made for our lesson, he gave me a bad evaluation recently. Well, I can't please everybody.

One thing I wouldn't ever forget is, one time when we had 5 minutes left for the lesson and he suddenly went quiet or maybe left without saying goodbye. I was like crazy saying  "hello, are you still there?" many times. The next time I had class with him again, I asked what happened and he just laughed. I couldn't contain my disappointment and so I told him: "If you don't respect me as you teacher, I would ask a favor to please respect me as a person." I know this, HIT HIM HARD! But he DESERVE it.

I am hoping that he is not going to take my lesson again because it wouldn't be like it was. I will be always remembering the time that I was DISRESPECTED by him who has a doctorate degree and who is now working at Harvard Cancer Center. This shows that no matter how high a person's education is, he/she could still be an ill-mannered homo sapien.

I am thankful that I still have respect in him so I chose not to mention his full profile in here because I am sure his integrity is somehow going to be ruined if I do so.



Note: This is also published in bubblews.com with the same and only one username.

Emperor: "If you understand devotion, you will understand Japan"

Photo taken from: http://www.nipponcinema.com

History is very difficult to comprehend specially if we are given a one-sided information. I have learned from elementary to college about WWII but I think it is just a small part of it. I was angered to know that Filipino soldiers were killed and my ancestors had experienced hardships and that was a one-sided emotion. I didn't ask myself, "How bad it is for the Japanese people after atomic bomb?"

This movie "Emperor" is set after the surrender of Japan during the WWII.  This is the investigation as to who initiated the war. The process is focused on the emperor, whether he should be condemned and be hanged as a war criminal.

General Douglas McArthur (Tommy Lee Jones) ordered General Bonner Fellers (Matthew Fox) to conduct the investigation. Fellers being in love with a Japanese woman who is an exchange student in the U.S way back in college would play a critical role in making his final decision if Emperor Hirohito is guilty in giving orders to instigate a war. 

I had come to realize why most Japanese people now are still reserve. It is not that it is difficult to express ones feeling but it is deeply rooted. It runs in the blood and in my opinion, no certain culture would change the fact. I totally misunderstand most Japanese people since I started working with them. I, being straightforward is anxious and challenged enough to make them speak out. I think my mission is going to fail knowing this fact.  I totally understand now that they are hundred percent devoted to their culture and country just like how their Emperor does.

Japan being the oldest monarchy of all monarchies has a a very unique one. Their Emperor is considered God, a symbol of Japanese. A person whom they will respect and wouldn't give up even it means taking their own lives. I have come to learn that being the Emperor of Japan is not earned because of ambition but because of modesty and calmness, yet has the courage to defend and choose which is right for its people even it will mean sufferings for him. 

Suicide is one thing I can't fathom. However, now I realize that it is performed thousand of years ago in Japan. They believe that if they are of burden to the many, it is better to take their own lives. If I will try to insert the concept of "devotion" in here, I would do the same thing but things are different in my culture. 

Learning the two sides of history made me better understand their culture. Although it is just a glimpse of it or let's say, what I have seen is not all factual, it still triggered me not to question ones culture but to respect them. Respect begets respect. 

I am very thankful to the one who recommended me this movie. A student of mine who I choose to keep her name unknown.