Expect the unexpected, I always tell my friends and family. I guess I have to practice what I am preaching now. I had overseen everything from the beginning and I think the kindness, eagerness and sincerity I had shown were all put to a different perspective. The story goes this way....
I have met this person, I will name him Student I (introvert) last July 9,2012. The usual thing went on, I introduced myself, hoping that he would do the same thing even just a bit of it. Well, he told me his name, his age, ( which I don't often get from my students), his job, where he is now. One thing I won't forget from the first meeting was, "I don't have hobbies". It hit me like a cold ice, this guy's life is boring then, I thought. The next day, he is my student again. His interest with my lesson lasted for a year. So I have been talking to him from July 2012 to July 2013. Wow! I couldn't believe I had pushed my patience so hard to give a decent lesson to this guy. And his interest? MEDICINE! What the hell would I do to make my brain understand the ins and outs of this field?! I took the challenge positively, did my best to provide topics that are within his interest alone. With the length of time that we were talking to each other, I had discovered so many things about him.
Problem 1:
He couldn't figure out his opinion based on abstract knowledge. Everything for him should be scientific. Without proper explanation of mechanism of certain event, it doesn't exist for him. Talk about being NERD here! Or basically, he just refuse to let other people know his perception.
Solution:
I provided him topics that are proven facts. Theories is fine for him but it should be presented in a way that there is a possibility to prove him with substantial amount of data.
Problem 2:
He kept telling me he wanted to speak out more but he just doesn't have the courage to do so. Is he shy or introvert? I had concluded the latter before but now I have proven that he is not. He's totally SHY.
Solution:
I dug up the internet for different articles and advise even positive views of being shy or introvert. I used a lot of examples of people living their lives in solitude yet they made extraordinary things and made themselves known to others in a rewarding way. Eleanor Roosevelt and Gandhi would be the perfect examples which Susan Cain mentioned in her TedTalks: The power of introvert. I had given these examples and I had hoped it would encourage him to use his personality in a good way rather than make shyness eat him. But I guess I failed.
Problem 3:
I am fully aware that we have mood swings. Sometimes, we don't think of other people when we do so. Even so, I tried my very best not to show those mood swings that I sometimes have. But I guess he is not doing the same thing. He's sometimes in the influence of alcohol, if not, he's still drinking. Well, I didn't mind that. I just told him that it is better to talk to him if he is in his normal state of mind. Every time he's drunk in class, I feel scared and nervous and I can't concentrate with the lesson.
Solution:
IGNORE.
Recently, he did something I never expected. He contacted me using his private skype ID and he said he misses me and wants friendship, this was after awhile of not having a lesson. I was surprised because he is the least person I would expect to do so considering the above mentioned personality. And also the fact that after all the efforts I had made for our lesson, he gave me a bad evaluation recently. Well, I can't please everybody.
One thing I wouldn't ever forget is, one time when we had 5 minutes left for the lesson and he suddenly went quiet or maybe left without saying goodbye. I was like crazy saying "hello, are you still there?" many times. The next time I had class with him again, I asked what happened and he just laughed. I couldn't contain my disappointment and so I told him: "If you don't respect me as you teacher, I would ask a favor to please respect me as a person." I know this, HIT HIM HARD! But he DESERVE it.
I am hoping that he is not going to take my lesson again because it wouldn't be like it was. I will be always remembering the time that I was DISRESPECTED by him who has a doctorate degree and who is now working at Harvard Cancer Center. This shows that no matter how high a person's education is, he/she could still be an ill-mannered homo sapien.
I am thankful that I still have respect in him so I chose not to mention his full profile in here because I am sure his integrity is somehow going to be ruined if I do so.
Note: This is also published in bubblews.com with the same and only one username.
Problem 1:
He couldn't figure out his opinion based on abstract knowledge. Everything for him should be scientific. Without proper explanation of mechanism of certain event, it doesn't exist for him. Talk about being NERD here! Or basically, he just refuse to let other people know his perception.
Solution:
I provided him topics that are proven facts. Theories is fine for him but it should be presented in a way that there is a possibility to prove him with substantial amount of data.
Problem 2:
He kept telling me he wanted to speak out more but he just doesn't have the courage to do so. Is he shy or introvert? I had concluded the latter before but now I have proven that he is not. He's totally SHY.
Solution:
I dug up the internet for different articles and advise even positive views of being shy or introvert. I used a lot of examples of people living their lives in solitude yet they made extraordinary things and made themselves known to others in a rewarding way. Eleanor Roosevelt and Gandhi would be the perfect examples which Susan Cain mentioned in her TedTalks: The power of introvert. I had given these examples and I had hoped it would encourage him to use his personality in a good way rather than make shyness eat him. But I guess I failed.
Problem 3:
I am fully aware that we have mood swings. Sometimes, we don't think of other people when we do so. Even so, I tried my very best not to show those mood swings that I sometimes have. But I guess he is not doing the same thing. He's sometimes in the influence of alcohol, if not, he's still drinking. Well, I didn't mind that. I just told him that it is better to talk to him if he is in his normal state of mind. Every time he's drunk in class, I feel scared and nervous and I can't concentrate with the lesson.
Solution:
IGNORE.
Recently, he did something I never expected. He contacted me using his private skype ID and he said he misses me and wants friendship, this was after awhile of not having a lesson. I was surprised because he is the least person I would expect to do so considering the above mentioned personality. And also the fact that after all the efforts I had made for our lesson, he gave me a bad evaluation recently. Well, I can't please everybody.
One thing I wouldn't ever forget is, one time when we had 5 minutes left for the lesson and he suddenly went quiet or maybe left without saying goodbye. I was like crazy saying "hello, are you still there?" many times. The next time I had class with him again, I asked what happened and he just laughed. I couldn't contain my disappointment and so I told him: "If you don't respect me as you teacher, I would ask a favor to please respect me as a person." I know this, HIT HIM HARD! But he DESERVE it.
I am hoping that he is not going to take my lesson again because it wouldn't be like it was. I will be always remembering the time that I was DISRESPECTED by him who has a doctorate degree and who is now working at Harvard Cancer Center. This shows that no matter how high a person's education is, he/she could still be an ill-mannered homo sapien.
I am thankful that I still have respect in him so I chose not to mention his full profile in here because I am sure his integrity is somehow going to be ruined if I do so.
Note: This is also published in bubblews.com with the same and only one username.
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